FINALLY

My BRCA results are FINALLY in. took long enough. 6 weeks for what should be a two week wait! They are negative!!! I do not carry the gene mutation!! I am THRILLED!! Thrilled for myself, thrilled for my daughter, thrilled for my sisters and nieces and thrilled for my son. It carries a lot of cancers with it so I am glad to not have to worry about all of that.


The oncologists office called me on Friday asking if I wanted to do another test called the BART test if my results came back negative. It's $700 and since it's an experimental test, insurance won't pay for it. I asked if my results were in and they said no. Then they called on Monday and said they are in. Fishy to me, but whatever. She wanted to set me up for next Tuesday to come in for my results...um, no. I went in yesterday.


When she called she said, your BRCA results are in and the dr would like you to come in and discuss the results. I KNEW they were positive because who gets called in for negative results?? Stressed out all night and all yesterday morning. All kinds of stuff going through my head. So when he said, it's negative, you don't carry the mutation, I didn't know how to react at first. My mind was so set that it was positive that I kind of sat there not knowing what to say. I asked him, why did you call me in for negative results?? Couldn't they have told me on the phone? He flipped through all my papers and said, actually, I don't know. oy. 


He also asked me how my second surgery went. I said, second surgery? I haven't even had one surgery yet. I've been waiting on these results. He said, oh, how did your surgery go then?    ??????? I said again, I haven't had any surgeries yet. Me & Matt kept looking at each other like, wow. He spent a lot of time flipping through my folder. Then he asked me who I was using for my lumpectomy. I told him, I still want the bilateral mastectomy. I've had 11 weeks to think about it and research everything and I am set on doing this. I have no doubt in my mind that this is what I want, what I'm going to do. He said he couldn't 100% agree with me because if he did, he'd be out of a job. It's his job to preserve the breasts and if he recommended all his breast cancer patients to have mastectomies, then he would be out of work. He said he didn't disagree with me either because if I'm going to live in fear of it coming back...and it does (he said that), and it also goes to the other one, then this is probably the best choice for me. He asked if I had a surgeon to use. I told him about the 2 he recommended...one won't talk to me about it and the other flat out said no. He was very surprised about that. He said he couldn't believe they said that. He said this is definitely an option and lots of women choose this option and it's my body, my life, my decision and he didn't understand why they felt that way. Then he got on his phone and made a couple calls to surgeons and plastic surgeons. I'm still waiting on call backs from them or him.


By the time we left the office I was starting to feel the weight lift off my shoulders. I've been so blah for so long. No energy, just dragging around. I feel such a weight off my shoulders. I can't imagine how I'm going to feel after my surgery is complete and I'm healing and healed. 


I asked him if I did go with the lumpectomy, what would be my treatments afterwards and for the rest of my life. He said radiation for sure, 7 weeks, 5 days a week. This time he said no hormones. I pointed out that last time he said hormones. More paper flipping haha. And also said every dr has told me hormone receptors. He said, we'd have to see after the lumpectomy. That's what I've been afraid of! That they tell me I don't need this and that so I go ahead with the lumpectomy and then they tell me I do need this and that. no thanks! And then he said he'd order MRI's every 6 months, probably for the rest of my life!! 


So then I asked what my treatment would be if I do the mastectomy and reconstruction. He said my numbers were so good on the BRCA report that it would be nothing. My chances of ever getting breast cancer would be extremely low. No mammo's, no MRI's, nothing. Done worrying, done dealing. That's my ticket! THAT'S what I want.


So, now to find a surgeon. I have an appt Friday afternoon with a breast specialist/surgeon. I'm hoping and praying she's on my side. I really want this done and over with.


For now I'm celebrating my good gene's!